Bits and Pieces
by Dark Seraphim
Summary: Drabbles and Short Shorts. A variety of stuff. Some yaoi.
1. Why doesn't forever ever last?

Notes: Two things gave me this idea. One, was my series of Sirius/Remus drabbles called "Kibbles and Bits and Bits and Bits". I'll post that on FF.net eventually, but it's at dreamnest.org right now. The other, was K. Stiltzkin's "Unwritten Memories". I figured that it would be much more practical to combine drabbles/shorts into one story than spread them all out in seperate entries. Shorts such as "But, just wear this", "Sweet and Strong", and "Mischief" have been revised somewhat, if you've reviewed those fics already, you can always review again.

* * *

Zanarkand looked like a bunch of jewels being thrown onto a dark blanket, but Shuyin never even noticed it. He knew that it wouldn't last since Bevelle had declared war. He didn't want to notice it, because if he did, it would tear his heart out. When he felt Lenne's arms around him, he felt better, but not much. She was a Summoner and as such, she would be in the front lines and would no doubt die eventually. That was the last thing he wanted to think about because it made him want to burst into flames.  
  
"What are you thinking, Shuyin?" Lenne asked, her long dark hair blanketing over Shuyin's blond head.  
  
He wanted to say, "Nothing," but she would have never believed it. He shut his dark eyes just to feel her more strongly since he was certain he would never feel her again before long. Shuyin took a few deep breaths before finally asking,  
  
"Why doesn't forever ever last?" 


	2. But, just wear this

[Rating]: PG  
  
[Notes]: A FFX-2 Baralai/Isaaru fic. Baralai is going on a "date" with Gippal and Isaaru is not very happy with that. Inspired by an old commercial and a LJ community called drabbleme.  
  
"Oh goodness! What am I going to wear?" Baralai asked while pacing around his room. He held a black robe embroidered with gold designs in front of him and while it looked nice, it didn't seem good enough for Baralai because he shook his platinum haired head and put it back in the closet.  
  
Isaaru watched him intently with narrowed eyes. If he had his way, Baralai would be in a burlap sack for his date with Gippal. He knew they were friends, but every time Baralai went on an outing with Gippal, Isaaru couldn't help but feel resentful.   
  
"Why must you go at all?" He ventured, knowing full well what the younger Praetor would say about that.  
  
Baralai stopped pacing and put his hands on his hips, "Isaaru, you know why! Gippal is a good friend of mine and I have to see him sometime."  
  
"I understand that, but..." Isaaru trailed off. "But..." Baralai raised his eyebrows as if asking 'well?' The former summoner shook his head, honestly not knowing what to come up with.  
  
"But, what, Isaaru?" Baralai asked, slowly approaching Isaaru.  
  
"I don't know what," Isaaru replied, slumping forward. "He's your friend and I know you have to see him sometime, but you two were lovers..."  
  
"Oh, I see," Baralai tilted his head. "You don't want me to go. You never approved of my outings with him." He grinned. "I should have sensed that sooner."  
  
"Uh...well, it's not that," Isaaru stammered. No, it wasn't that. Isaaru always admired the closeness the two younger men shared and he was always amused when they joked to each other. Even when the two teamed up to pick on Isaaru, he always enjoyed their laughter. But, even so, sometimes he would still tense up when he noticed how close Gippal and Baralai were and still are. "I just worry-"  
  
"Isaaru, please!" Baralai interrupted, holding up his dark skinned hand. "Whatever Gippal and I have done in the past is just that--the past. There's nothing more between us now, thanks to you, I might add." Baralai smiled, wrapping his arms around Isaaru and giving him gentle kisses all over his face. The former summoner returned the embrace, feeling little shocks as he felt Baralai's soft lips against him. "Don't you worry, my love," Baralai whispered softly, pulling away to move his hands up and down Isaaru's arms. "When I get home tonight, I'll kiss you all over and you'll feel much better. Perfect for a jealous lover."  
  
Isaaru couldn't help but smile as he felt his body almost radiate with warm desire. "Me jealous? No..." However, when Baralai backed away with a knowing look in his golden brown eyes, Isaaru shook his head and saw an orange robe in the closet. He seriously wondered how that got there as it looked like something a maid would use as a rag. Trying not to laugh, he handed the hideous article of clothing to Baralai. "But, just wear this."  
  
Baralai's eyes widened, "Isaaru, that's horrible. Orange is NOT my color."   
  
"I know!" Isaaru grinned. "Well, at least it's not animal print!"  
  
Baralai smirked, "If it were animal print, I'd kill you!"  
  
"I know that too." Isaaru said before they both nearly fell down laughing. Catching his breath, Isaaru asked, "So what would you like me to do with it?" The Praetor, still smirking, raised his eyebrows.   
  
"Burn it." 


	3. Sweet and Strong

[Rating] PG-13  
[Notes] This is another FFX-2 Baralai/Isaaru fic. I'm not too satisfied with this one. Didn't quite go the way I thought it would, but that happens with fics. This is just a drabble for the livejournal community, "drabbleme".

* * *

Dark chocolate. Every time Isaaru even thought of dark chocolate, he smiled. When he ate it, he grinned like a mule eating briars. As he sat across from Baralai, who was consuming such chocolate, not only did Isaaru grin, he couldn't help but say,  
  
"Candy says many things about people."  
  
Baralai's eyebrows shot up, "Does it now?" He stood up, slowly walked in front of his desk and leaned against it. He folded his arms across his chest, looking intently at Isaaru, but the former summoner wouldn't budge an inch. Not that he had to because he saw a faint glimmer of a smile on the young Praetor's full lips.   
  
Isaaru leaned back against the chair, "Yes, many things." He chuckled, "Okay, I love dark chocolate."  
  
"So do I," Baralai replied, his smile now completely visible. "Tell me Isaaru, what does dark chocolate say about the both of us?"  
  
"I'm only referring to you, Baralai," Isaaru said. "I'll put it as simply as possible. Dark chocolate is like my coffee, sweet and strong..."  
  
"Yet with a hint of bitterness..." Baralai gently finished for him. He looked down, part of his handsome face hidden in his high collar. "I suppose we both still have reasons to be bitter."  
  
The former summoner nodded, "Yes, we do. We both have our burdens to bear. We've been through much. Both seperately and together. I guess neither of us were very good at letting go of the past."  
  
Baralai sighed, "We're not good at it now. Even though everything has mended, I still have my scars," He rubbed the right side of his bad. "Both external and internal."  
  
"All my scars are internal," Isaaru shook his head, wondering how the conversation turned the way they did. "But, I say that such scars are much worse than the ones on the body," he quickly looked over Baralai's well toned body, remembering the scar on the Praetor's back, and how it marred the otherwise perfect skin. Before Baralai could say anything, Isaaru said, "I didn't mean for our conversation to shift in that direction."  
  
"Then what did you mean?" Baralai inquired, deftly kneeling in front of Isaaru, placing his dark skinned hands on the older man's thighs.  
  
Isaaru quietly gasped, not so much surprised that Baralai had taken the inititave, but rather the way he took the initiative as his hands slowly moved up the former summoner's thighs. Putting his hands on top of Baralai's, he finally said, "You are sweet and strong."  
  
The Praetor looked up at him, his piercing gaze never wavering. "So are you," He answered.  
  
"Hah, you flatter me," Isaaru sighed, looking up, but as soon as he did, Baralai gently pulled his head down, forcing the older man to drown in those light brown eyes. "I would be one of those chocolates that no matter how sweet, would always have a bitter aftertaste."  
  
"All chocolate is like that, Isaaru," Baralai answered. "Coffee is little different. That's why I have tea or water after having either. It keeps the sweetness in, but washes the bitterness away." He leaned close to Isaaru, his full lips inches away. "I don't flatter you, Isaaru, I meant what I said."  
  
Feeling their breath intertwine, Isaaru could smell the dark chocolate and he was hard pressed to say anything except, "I feel the same way about you". Before he could say anything else, Baralai's sealed Isaaru's lips with his own.


	4. Mischief

Notes: One of these days, I'm going to write "There are no cars in Spira" about 100 times. But, it's so fun to have poor Baralai driving. Kind of a contrast against Paine. She's more of a pilot, and Baralai would be more of a driver, imho. As for Gippal, he could do both, while bothering Baralai at the same time. Anywaym I figured what the heck. If they have airships and hovercrafts, why not some cars? Anyway, Baralai is still learning to drive and is doing quite well. That's when Gippal decides to have some fun.

* * *

If Baralai had his way, Rin's silver convertible would have been his for the taking. Unfortunately, it wasn't his or Gippal's, but only borrowed for driving lessons. Not that Baralai cared all that much, he figured that so long as he could at least drive around for a little bit, all was well. He sat back against the driver's seat, gently running his hands over the wheel, paying attention to every detail, the field around him, the scent of the wind as it blew through his platinum hair, the sound and feel of the engine each time he shifted gears. Through the corner of his golden brown eyes, he saw Gippal leaning against the car door with a smile on his face. Baralai reflected that smile and sighed. He briefly looked up at the blue sky and didn't see a single cloud.  
  
/Beautiful/.  
  
These were among his favorite times with Gippal, when they were alone together without Nooj or Paine to pester them. He was especially happy that Paine wasn't here since that would mean no recordings. He pouted as he remembered some of the more embarrassing reports she managed to record before he threatened to break the camera over her head. Those thoughts faded away as he accelerated and the adrenaline rushed through him once again.   
  
"Ah, about damned time," Gippal commented. "I thought I'd have to grab your knee again."  
  
Baralai rolled his eyes, "I was just trying to get something out of my mind."  
  
"What?"  
  
"Uhm, I don't think you need to know that," Baralai smirked, honestly not wanting to think about how Paine caught the two young men kissing a few days before.  
  
"Always secretive," Gippal replied leaning towards Baralai, putting his arm around his shoulder.  
  
"Uhm, what are you doing?" Baralai asked, gripping the steering wheel so he wouldn't lose control.  
  
"I'm testing you," Gippal said with a cocky grin.  
  
"Uh, excuse me?"  
  
"Come on, Baralai, I think you're ready for this." Gippal answered, pressing his lips against Baralai's cheek before moving down to his neck.  
  
"Oh! Gippal!" Baralai gasped, trying not to kick the gas pedal. He kept his eyes on the road in front of him and didn't even swerve. He wanted to lean away, but feared that he would lose control if he did so. He almost did when Gippal stuck his hand in Baralai's white shirt to graze over a hardening nipple. He grit his teeth, "Gippal! No! Do you want to get killed?" He tried to push Gippal away, but the younger Al Bhed held onto him tightly, his fingers gilding down Baralai's chest to untie the leather plate that shielded his genitals.  
  
"Oh no, Gippal," Baralai cried as Gippal managed to loosen his "chastity belt" and grope Baralai's member under his beige pants. Feeling a jolt run through him, Baralai almost floored it, but he managed to lift his foot off the gas rather lean on it. "Gippal, please stop!" He shouted, frustrated as he felt his own body betray him.   
  
"Don't worry, Baralai," Gippal said, his breath tickling Baralai's ear. "We'll be fine."  
  
Baralai shook his head, ignoring his hardening member. "No, Gippal. I'm putting my foot down." And he did. On the brake, stalling the car as he neglected to step on the clutch as well. When Gippal finally backed away with a shocked look in his one eye, Baralai glared at him. "Have you gone mad? We could have been killed! Couldn't you have at least waited until we got back to the hotel?"  
  
Gippal shrugged with a smirk, "Nah. It would've been too easy."  
  
"Oh," Baralai helplessly chuckled, "Touche'". 


	5. I can't do this

Notes: This particular piece was supposed to be in "When I Dance Around You". Baralai was trying to forge a very strong alliance with Gippal through, yup, you guessed it, marriage. This would give New Yevon a huge advantage, etc, etc. This was originally supposed to be a plot section where Baralai tells Isaaru of him plans, Isaaru does not approve, but realizes his mistake in rejecting Baralai twice. Too bad, eh? However, he supports Baralai with his plan. Unfortunately, Baralai's plans go awry. I looked over this piece and then looked at what I had so far with "When I Dance Around You." Needless to say, I chucked this plot line out the window. So, here it is with "Bits and Pieces".

* * *

"I can't do this."  
  
As soon as Baralai heard that, his heart stopped. Or, it certainly felt like it did. He just stood there, his golden brown eyes flickering to the crowd below, knowing that this was in front of thousands of people, including the Gullwings, members of the Youth League, and Isaaru.  
  
"What is the meaning of this?" Zetu demanded, nearly dropping the ceremonial book, his own eyes as wide as Baralai's.  
  
The young Praetor snapped out of his shocked state and looked at Gippal, "Excuse me?"  
  
"I told you, I can't do this. I just realized it, Baralai," Gippal shook his head. "Let's not do this."  
  
Baralai took a deep breath and slowly let it out, "To my room, Gippal, follow me." He spun on his heel and briskly walked off the roof towards his room, his shimmering white coat billowing behind him. He didn't look back. He didn't have to since he knew that Gippal was following him.  
  
Back in his room, Baralai, tempted to just slam the door, simply shut it gently and leaned against it, trying to maintain his calm. He looked at Gippal, whose back was to him and still looked gorgeous in his all black outfit, but Baralai put it out of his mind. After taking a few long breaths, he slowly circled around his best friend and lover.   
  
"What is going on here, Gippal? " Baralai asked as if they were ordering food at a restraunt. "Are you nervous?" He tilted his his head, "Hmm?"  
  
"That's not it, Baralai,' Gippal finally answered.  
  
"Then, what is it?" The Praetor's voice lowered to an incisive whisper as his felt his heart quicken.  
  
"I can't marry you, Baralai. It's as simple as that." Gippal put a hand on his blond head. "I'm sorry, Baralai."  
  
/This is not happening. Oh Yevon, this is not happening/! "Why not? Why can't you marry me?" Baralai grit his teeth when he felt the control he had over his voice slip away.  
  
The Al Bhed looked right at him and glared, "Because I will not be used by you or by anyone."  
  
Horrifed, Baralai gaped. /He can't have known.../. "How dare you, Gippal! I love you! I would never use you! What makes you say these things?"  
  
"Because they're true," Gippal replied simply.  
  
"No, no..." Baralai shook his head, "We're friends, we're lovers, we're close! Good gods, Gippal! You have no reason to refuse me. You're just nervous, that's all. I can understand that. We are both young." Baralai fell silent as he tried to control his breathing. He held his hands out in front of him to steady himself.   
  
"Baralai, I'm not stupid. I know what you want to do."  
  
"Gippal, I'm not accusing you of being stupid. Goodness, Gippal, I love you. You know that. Please, Gippal, just marry me..."  
  
"No."  
  
Honestly at a loss, Baralai held out his hands to his sides, "You don't love me? Is that it?"  
  
"That's not it at all, Baralai, I do love you--"  
  
"Then what is all this talk about refusing to marry me?" Baralai shouted, no longer caring about maintaining control of his emotions. Everything else was slipping away, why not his feelings?   
  
"You want to use me, that's what!" Gippal shouted back. "You want this world for yourself and you intended to use marriage to forge an alliance between New Yevon and the Machine Faction! You knew all of Spira would see it that way and you knew that such an alliance would give New Yevon power over the entire fucking world! Well, I won't allow it!"  
  
The Praetor could do nothing but gape. /How could you have known? Oh...Nooj.../. "He got to you, didn't he? Nooj did, yes?"  
  
"Does it matter?" Gippal replied, his hands curling into fists. "You think Nooj would have made a difference with me?"  
  
"Oh yes," Baralai nodded. "Oh yes..." /I should have know Nooj would get to Gippal. How could I have been so foolish? Oh, Yevon, Isaaru was right.../.  
  
Gippal shook his head, "If you have to know, he did talk to me, but it wouldn't have mattered. I knew it all along, Baralai."   
  
Not wanting to hear this, Baralai shook his head, "No...no...it's not true. I love you..." He shut his eyes to prevent any tears from forming. "I love you with all my heart, I truly do." /Please, don't let this happen/.  
  
"I believe you Baralai and I told you, I love you--"  
  
"Then marry me, damn it!" Baralai yelled, glaring at Gippal.   
  
"I told you no," Gippal firmly replied, "Just be honest with me, Baralai."  
  
"I am being honest with you!"  
  
"Just tell me you wanted to use me."  
  
At this point, Baralai realized that no amount of web spinning or lies would fool Gippal. Baralai could have just kicked himself. He should have known better. He should have know that even if he really did have no such intent, Spira would have forged the intent. Clasping his dark skinned hands in front of him, Baralai nodded.  
  
"Okay, I won't lie to you," He finally said quietly. "I knew that Spira would have seen our marriage as an alliance. I knew that and decided to take advantage of it rather than just act as if it weren't possible. I just want what's best for Spira and I know that my way is the best." He grit his teeth when he saw Gippal roll his one eye, but he pressed onward. "You believe me, yes?" When Gippal nodded, he felt hope. "Please, Gippal, it's not like Spira will fall apart. Don't you remember what the three of us said in Luca? Do you really think Nooj would ruin that? Do you think I would?"  
  
"Of course not, but I know that if we were to marry, the Youth League would be powerless compared to the two of us."  
  
"Yes, they would be. I knew that," Baralai answered. He sighed, running a hand through his platinum hair. "But, this is right, don't you understand?"  
  
"No, Baralai."  
  
Baralai's heart sank, but he persisted as he would be damned before he let the love of his life and the opportunity for New Yevon to become more powerful slip away, "Please, Gippal, just think of this marriage as it should be, for love. That's what this is first and foremost."  
  
"No, Baralai."  
  
He could have torn his own hair out, but he didn't, "Gippal...we're meant to be together, don't you see that?" When Gippal shook his head, fury erupted in Baralai's body so much that he could have burst into flames. "How dare you, Gippal! If you felt this way all along, why did you say yes when I proposed to you?"  
  
Now it was Gippal's turn to sigh, "Because...because at first, I really didn't care what our marriage would mean to the world. I wasn't concerned with anything but us being together. But, then I realized that I would be tied down and I was angry, angry that in the end, no matter how much you claimed to love me, you were using me as a stepping stone and that hurt, Baralai. I wanted to get back at you by trying to humiliate you."  
  
Hissing through his teeth, Baralai squeezed his eyes shut and tilted his head back. "Do you realize what done?" He looked back down, his golden brown eyes blazing. "You may not take the vows of marriage seriously, but I do! When you refused me, you insulted me, my family, my life, my bloodline! By Yevon, why would you hurt me like this? In front of thousands! Dear gods..." Baralai put his hands over his mouth because if he didn't, he would have charred Gippal with the intensity of a thousand suns.  
  
None of this seemed to faze Gippal as he only folded his arms across his chest, "There's one more reason." When Baralai responded only with a piercing gaze, Gippal uttered, "Isaaru."  
  
His anger suddenly dissappating, Baralai's full lips parted, "What of him?"  
  
"Did you think I wouldn't know about that either?"  
  
/Oh no.../. "No, Gippal...I--"  
  
"Love him?"  
  
"No!" Baralai insisted, "No..." He shook his head fiercely, "No..."  
  
"Baralai, you should know better than to think you could make a fool of me. You've been with him, haven't you?"  
  
"We're friends! Nothing more, nothing less!"  
  
Gippal shook his head, his one eye narrowing, "You're lying."  
  
"No, Gippal..."   
  
"If you keep lying, we're finished entirely. We will be enemies and I'll choose the Youth League while you and New Yevon fade away."  
  
Tears rolled down Baralai's fair face as he knew that Gippal meant it, "O-okay, it's true...I do love him, but it's not the same..."  
  
"It doesn't matter," Gippal said softly, "You still love him. You still kissed him, held him, fucked him---"  
  
"Stop it!" Baralai snapped. "Just stop it!" It took every inch of what remained of his will power to not fall to his knees.  
  
"All that matters now is that you have Isaaru, who is far better for you than I could ever be, and I am free." When Baralai didn't say anything, Gippal approached him, "This is for the best, trust me."  
  
When Gippal said those words, Baralai was reminded of what happened between them just two years ago and all the rage coupled with despair he felt back then came back in full force, but he didn't shout or move. He simply stood there, his piercing eyes watching Gippal intently.  
  
"Please leave," He finally said gently.   
  
"It's for the best, Baralai," Gippal insisted.  
  
"Please leave," Baralai repeated.  
  
When Gippal finally did, Baralai closed his eyes and again tilted his head back, his well-sculpted body trembling as his hands opened and closed. He slowly breathed in and out, willing his heart beat to just slow down. But, no matter what he did, the pain remained and it sapped him of his strength. When he finally fell to his knees, he rested his forehead against his wrists, and quietly wept. 


	6. Do you know what love is?

Notes: This one is FFX, and was a drabble request. I eventually figured "what the heck" and added it to the drabble collection.

* * *

Yuna didn't say anything as Seymour paced around his room, staring at her. It's not as if she could though because he froze her without doing anything but have a presence. Even if she could think of something to say, she really didn't want to say anything as she figured that the words would sound hollow in Seymour's ears anyway.  
  
She remembered how Seymour pretty much posted in neon lights that he loved her, but she didn't believe it for a second. Nothing would make a young Maester look better than marrying a Summoner, especially the daughter of a High Summoner. However, what bothered her more than anything was that he would prosper at her expense. Her Pilgrimage would be over and it would no doubt fall to fellow Summoner Isaaru to complete it. It's not that she minded Isaaru becoming High Summoner, what she did mind was that she would be in Seymour's shadow forever, no doubt locked in a cage.  
  
"Lady Yuna," Seymour said, "Do you know what love is?"  
  
Not knowing how to respond, she simply shrugged.  
  
"Sacrifice."  
  
That word shot through Yuna as though it were a bullet. /Love is sacrifice? But, I don't love you and the only sacrifice I intend to make is for Spira/. When her Guardians entered the room, she couldn't have felt more relief. 


	7. Culinary Habits

Note: This is just a little drabble of what my version of Baralai eats. Obviously, I wouldn't write it like this in a fic. Enjoy!

* * *

For Baralai, nearly every single scrap of food just had to be spicy or filled with some kind of sauce. Otherwise, it simply wasn't food to him. Bland food made him blanch. Toast without cinnamon and butter just wasn't worth even looking at, much less eat. When he had his coffee, it was vital to have not just cream and sugar, but cinnamon. His eggs had to drown in the hottest of sauces. Vegetables had to be swimming in herbs and even more spices. Ice cream had to have tangy desert sprinkles, and of course, cinnamon. The only things that didn't have to have anything in it was water and certain teas, and even then, he sometimes had a glass with a lemon in it.  
  
So, Baralai was never surprised to find that those who dined with him thought he was absolutely insane. 


	8. Teaser

Notes: This is just a little teaser for my larger fic, "When I Dance Around You". It's here because to be quite honest, there's no guarantee that it'll be in the fic itself. Even if it were, it probably wouldn't be quite like this. I figured it can't hurt to post something like this here, especially since I can't promise anything when it comes to scenes/plotlines. Things always seem to awry when actually implementing ideas. Heh.

* * *

"I would just like to make this clear, and I speak for all those who support Isaaru. If he should leave for any reason, rest assured that every single one of us would go with him. Should he die, then there will be war amongst us."  
  
A lesser man would have gaped, shown indignance or even anger, but not Baralai. He remained impassive, studying the woman who always meant business because that's what she did outside of New Yevon's halls. Baralai knew she wasn't lying and as his dark eyes flickered around the room, he saw that the vast majority of Isaaru's supporters weren't either. He looked over at his own supporters, at how they were every bit as impassive, but he knew that they were feeling what he was feeling. How anyone could have the audacity to make something that clear in front of those who no doubt loved all this was just beyond Baralai. The Praetor knew that she was never like this before and neither were the other Isaaru supporters, but he supposed that those who take someone for granted would never do so again if they had a second chance.   
  
He didn't have to look at those who opposed both him and Isaaru. They too showed nothing, but Baralai sensed that they were waiting for this, and would no doubt try to play one faction against the other, even though it probably wouldn't work as it never did before. Who knows now? Baralai did not show any doubts though. Instead, he showed his sweetest smile as he folded his slender hands on the table.   
  
"Well, I sincerely hope it never comes to that," Baralai replied, actually very sincere as he really didn't need strife among the New Yevonites nor did he need to chance losing power because of the division between himself and Isaaru. "Please remember that we all live on the same world and that as fellow Yevonites, we should work together instead of against each other." When the woman smiled, looking down as she blushed, he couldn't help but feel a little smug. She was embarassed, and as far as Baralai was concerned, she should be embarassed as should Isaaru himself and his supporters. He did feel for them though as they were right in the middle of the New Yevon spectrum. Neither too Conservative or too Liberal, Isaaru's followers proved to be the landslide that ensured Baralai his near unanimous victory as the youngest Praetor ever. They also proved to be the swings that always swung in Baralai's favor. He intended to keep it that way. 


	9. I cannot

This piece is an answer to a challange at In under 300 words, you write a fic of a character in an RPG Game. The readers are supposed to guess who it's about. In this case, it should be a no brainer.

* * *

I cannot bear to see you with her. I cannot bear to see you kiss her, hold her, run your hands through her silver hair, even dine with her. Every second with her is a reminder that I cannot ever have you in that way. When you announced your engagement to her, you stabbed me in the heart. I know you told me that we could never be more than friends and that your heart belonged to her, but that did not deflect the knife. I couldn't look at either at you. It is why I declined being your Best Man for your wedding day, and it is why I left before the ceremony began.

I can't be friends with you. I can't even work with you. It would mean hiding behind a smile while agonizing on the inside. It would mean always dreaming of you knowing that you are forever unattainable. I don't want to live like that, so I choose to come back here to Zanarkand, and this time, I intend to stay. You look stricken. Let that be a lesson to you, for at least it will give you an idea of how I feel. At least the one you love loves you back.

So, go back to Bevelle, run New Yevon without your aide. I'm sure you'll be fine without me. I'm sure you'll enjoy your life with those closer to you than I ever was. I don't have to see any of it, and I don't intend to. I mean no malice. In fact, I wish you well, but only from afar. So, may you live in joy with your new wife, the love of your life.

But, please don't come here again.


	10. Some Skill

Notes: This is a scene from "When I Dance Around You." The reason why it's here is because while it will be in the story, it won't be like this as the storyline has changed since it was first thought of. So, here is the first "version" of it, so to speak. The later version will be in the story itself. Yes, I shamelessly stole parts of the scene from the Two Towers, why do you ask? Yea, I'm aware that there are a ton of martial arts styles out there, but I wasn't sure of which styles to give either men since this is on Spira, so I just generalized. Eh. Anyway, enjoy. This was from a drabble challenge with the line "Did you ever get the feeling that you couldn't trust anyone in the world?"

* * *

It had been years since Isaaru trained in the martial arts, but since Summoning was no longer necessary on Spira, it was all he had left other than his magic. Standing in the middle of the training room in, it seemed like everything had come back to him. He was rusty, but every movement reminded him of how graceful he once was. Every punch and kick became easier to execute and he found himself wanting to learn more, or at least to remember more. He knew that he had to be careful since it had been so long, but he felt that he should try at least one spinning move, and when he did so, his punch connected with Baralai's block.

Eyes widened, Isaaru threw another fist, only to have that blocked as well. Regaining his senses, the Former Summoner found himself blocking a couple of Baralai's own punches and when he blocked a high kick from the young Praetor, Isaaru fell back, completely stiff, as if waiting for another attack. His stomach wasn't lurching, nor did he feel like he was going to burst into flames. Instead, he was ready to pounce as soon as Baralai moved. Isaaru's steely gaze softened when he noticed that Baralai merely stood there with a gentle smile on his face.

"You have some skill," he said in his usual soft-spoken voice.

At first Isaaru said nothing as he noticed that Baralai was without his dark green coat. He looked past Baralai's shoulder and found it folded neatly on one of the chairs. When Baralai crossed his finely toned arms, Isaaru walked over to his blue and white robe and put it on before finally answering in his own soft voice.

"One of the first things I learned as a child was that those who do not fight can still die fighting."

Baralai's golden brown eyes widened as he tilted his white haired head to the side and his full lips parted. Isaaru couldn't help but smile as he knew that Baralai 'got it'. The younger man nodded.

"I see. Who was your master?"

"My mother taught me."

The young Praetor's eyebrows shot up, but he otherwise appeared unphased, "How long did you train?"

"Since I was five. I trained for ten years."

"Ten years..." Baralai nodded. He frowned, "Why did you quit?"

Isaaru smiled bitterly, looking upward as if reminiscing. "Just before Braska's Calm began, both my parents were killed by Sin." He looked down, his eye narrowing. "How's that for irony?"

"I'm sorry..." Baralai whispered, slowly approaching Isaaru, his booted feet barely making any sound. He held out his dark skin hand, but hesitated and clasped his hands in front of him.

"It's not your fault."

"I know," Baralai smiled. "Believe me, I know how it feels. At least you have your brothers." He looked down, his smile fading. "I was an only child."

"If I may ask, Baralai, who was your master?"

Baralai looked up, his smile returning, "My father taught me and I have been trained for sixteen years. Even now, I still train as it is my life."

"I'm not certain what I would have done had my parents not been killed," Isaaru replied suddenly. "I became a summoner when they died because I wanted to bring the Calm to avenge them and save Spira. I admired Braska and wanted to be like him."

"I see.." Baralai nodded slowly, taking another step forward. "To be honest, I'm glad you failed."

"Ugh...I figured you'd say that." Isaaru replied, narrowing his eyes. "When I think about it now, my death would have been in vain as the cycle would have just continued and Maroda would become Sin with Pacce being all alone."

"And I would not have you with me," Baralai said softly, his golden eyes closing. "You would have failed anyway..."

"Why do you say that?" Isaaru asked.

The younger man opened his eyes with a steely look, "Because you never seemed to open up to anyone, except for your brothers. Braska may have had two Guardians, but at least he opened up to people." He shook his head. "You never did that. Not from what I've seen of you. Why were you like that? Why are you like that now?"

"Did you ever get the feeling that you couldn't trust anyone in the world?" Isaaru suddenly asked, feeling his chest tighten.

"Touche," Baralai replied, his smile becoming a grimace.

"So, you know what it means to be betrayed?" Isaaru's soft voice pierced the air as he tried to repress painful memories.

"Oh yes..." Baralai whispered. "For two years, I honestly thought I had no one. But, thankfully, I found that I was wrong."

"You're just lucky. The one you thought betrayed you wasn't to blame for his actions."

"Oh, it's not just Nooj," Baralai answered, holding up a chiding finger. "You wouldn't know as you left as soon as old Yevon fell apart."

"As I told you, there was a reason for that." /You were among those reasons, Praetor/.

"I know..." Baralai replied. "You know you can't always rely on magic. That's why you were in here." He now stood so close that Isaaru could almost feel Baralai's body. He could smell the leathery spice scent that emanated from the young Praetor and Isaaru felt dizzy. Tentatively, Baralai put his hands on Isaaru's arms and let them slowly slide down, gently rubbing Isaaru's hands. "It's been many years for you. You still have much to learn." He looked directly into Isaaru's eyes, "I can train you."

Feeling his heart pounding, Isaaru did not reply. Instead he walked away, but Baralai grabbed his hand, forcing him to look back at the younger man.

"Please understand that I will not have any more problems between us," Baralai said gently, but his eyes belied a resolve that nearly caused Isaaru to faint.

"I--I understand," Isaaru managed before nearly running out of the room.


	11. I hope you lose

Notes: This is a scene from "When I Dance Around You." The reason why it's here is because while it will be in the story, it won't be like this as the storyline has changed since it was first thought of. So, here is the first "version" of it, so to speak. The later version will be in the story itself. Yea, I'm aware that there are a ton of martial arts styles out there, but I wasn't sure of which styles to give to the characters, so I just generalized. Eh. Anyway, enjoy. This was from a drabble challenge with the line "I hope you lose." Yet more of how Isaaru/Maroda interact and it's right after "Some Skill."

* * *

"I heard you met Baralai in the training room," Maroda said, walking up to Isaaru. They were surrounded by various lush green plants, roses and an array of rainbow flowers, but neither of them noticed right now.

"Yes, I did," Isaaru answered, looking at a yellow rose that shined with dew drops, but a second later, turned to Maroda. Baralai's words still rang in his ears, _I can train you _and _please understand that I will have no more problems between us_. In fact, the entire encounter rang in his ears.

"Can you tell me what happened?" Maroda asked.

Isaaru sighed, "Yes, I can." And he did, noting that his brother went from stoic to gaping in about two seconds.

"So, why didn't you just accept it, Isaaru?" Maroda demanded. "Baralai is one of the best fighters out there!"

"I know," Isaaru looked upward so Maroda couldn't see him roll his eyes. "But, for Baralai, things tend to take on multiple meanings."

"Oh, come on, Isaaru. There is absolutely no need to be paranoid. This isn't like Old Yevon, yanno," Maroda shrugged. "You're being unreasonable and you have been ever since Baralai came back." He took a step towards Isaaru, narrowing his dark eyes, "Besides, you're not telling me everything."

"What do you mean?" Isaaru asked, knowing damned well what Maroda meant. It was fresh in his mind.

"_Isaaru!" Baralai called out, his voice soft, but incisive enough to freeze him. His back stiff, Isaaru turned around. When the young Praetor slowly approached him, Isaaru couldn't move. He helplessly watched as Baralai again stood very close, looking up at him._

"_There are many lessons I can teach you," Baralai whispered, his piercing dark eyes unwavering._

_/Again with the innuendoes/. But, instead of saying that, Isaaru's gaze did not waver either as he chose to resort to a tactic often used by prospective students, "If you wish to teach me anything, you will have to defeat me."_

_Baralai backed up, raising his eyebrows. He stared at Isaaru for a moment before smiling, "Okay, I will. Meet me here tonight." Before Isaaru could even think 'what am I getting into?' Baralai brushed past Isaaru, grabbed his green coat and walked off with a noticeable spring in his steps._

When Isaaru finally recounted all this to his brother, standing completely still was all he could do to prevent from killing Maroda, who doubled over in laughter. "I'm glad you find that funny, Maroda."

"Oh, you are going to get your ass kicked! You haven't practiced much in years," Maroda said between gasps of laughter. "In fact, I'll bet that you wouldn't last a minute against the Praetor. I'm going to bet on it!"

"Just a second, Maroda, do you really think I could lose against him? Have you no faith in your elder brother?" Isaaru demanded, knowing full well that he would probably would be defeated, but how can anyone be certain?

"In this? None whatsoever!" Maroda shook his head, "Baralai is a fighter monk. Martial Arts is his life. I say that kind of decreases your chances. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to place some bets. I hope you lose."

"Gee, thanks," Isaaru folded his arms across his chest, wishing his arm could stretch far enough to smack his younger brother.


	12. Dish

"This is too bland," Baralai says while he's poking at a beef curry dish that looks so hot, that fire could burst from the top at any minute.

"What?" Gippal gasps, and not just because of what Baralai says. He's trying, but failing to eat the curry. "Bland?" He gulps down a gallon of water like a dog that finished waling through the desert. "On what planet?" He looks ready to die, but that doesn't stop him from eating the rest of the curry. Gippal looks at Isaaru. "What do you think?"

"I think it's perfect," Isaaru replies, unable to conceal a very evil grin. Why shouldn't he be evil? He's the one who made the curry dish. Does Gippal know that? No, and Isaaru intends to keep it that way.

"Why do I even bother asking you?" Gippal shakes his head. "You like the same things he does anyway!"

"Not exactly," Baralai answers while grinning at Isaaru. "He's not quite the spice fiend that I am."

"I have my limits, Baralai."

"Yes, I can see that, Isaaru. Still, an excellent dish."

Gippal gapes. "You made the dish?"

Isaaru nods, "Yes, I did."

"Did it have to be so spicy?" Gippal asks.

"Yes, of course it does."

Baralai shakes his head, "Mmmmm...a little bland though. Not enough Killikan chilies."

Gippal practically thuds on the table. "You can't be serious."

Isaaru, however, only smiles. "Next time, you make the curry."

"Don't expect me to eat it." Gippal moans from the depths of the table, which draws flat out laughter from the other two. He's not surprised, and he won't be surprised if he ends up trying to eat Baralai's curry anyway.


	13. When one is born

_Notes: Written for a Livejournal Community called "Philosophy20". Theme is "Birth"._

"This is the birth of a new Spira!"

Both Baralai and Isaaru heard this uttered often by everyone from Yuna to the average man on the street. Even people in Bevelle started adopting that mindset and they lived in the capital of conservative New Yevon. Baralai didn't mind so much. In fact, he often smiled when he heard the phrase. He did that now while he folded his arms over the balcony railing. Isaaru, on the other hand, often felt his stomach drop when he heard the phrase. Now he merely sighed.

"When one is born, someone must die." Isaaru followed Baralai's gaze to the sunset painted skies of Bevelle. He wished he could smile with the young Praetor, but couldn't.

They both stood at the highest building in Bevelle, the one Yevon leaders and their right hands shared. Everything looked better from above. At least that's what Isaaru believed, and it comforted him now, but barely.

Baralai frowned. "What do you mean? Why do you say that now?" He turned toward Isaaru.

"You've heard it all before. The birth of a new Spira and all that."

A dawning brightened the younger man's golden brown eyes. "I see." He looked away, at the clouds turned purple from twilight. "But, no one would die because a new Spira is born."

"We would die." The stone floor echoed those words as Isaaru stood beside his young lover. "Our ways would die. For Spira to be reborn anew, our ways must die. Everyone else seems to believe that"

"That's not true!" Baralai's eyes widened. "I can't believe you'd say something like that. You of all people know that change is slow, and that's how it should be."

"Yes, I know that's how it should be, but it just seems to me that those not of Yevon believe differently." Isaaru could smell ocean musk when Baralai embraced him, and it made him smile. Just like all the scents Baralai wore as cologne.

"Even if they did, so what? People don't suddenly die because another is born. Both things come to us all, but none of it is immediate, and change doesn't mean death. Even if Bevelle itself changes, the teachings of Yevon would remain. No amount of births will cause the deaths of what we believe in." Baralai ran his fingertips down the nape of Isaaru's neck. "Besides, there's room enough on Spira for many different kinds of beliefs."

Oddly enough, the former Summoner found himself comforted. Whether it was because of Baralai's words or his gentle fingertips, Isaaru didn't know or care.


	14. Prompts

Notes: This batch was written for Dreamwidth's fic_promptly.

* * *

Besaid, Final Fantasy X, any character, putting things back together after Sin attacks

Besaid meant everything to Yuna. So when Sin attacked, she made sure to put everything back together. Obviously, she wasn't the only one to feel this way. Everyone who lived on Besaid made it a point to make sure that everything would rebuilt stronger than before. Her father, Braska, made sure to help by sacrificing himself to ensure a calm, a time of rebuilding.

Yuna decided that when she grew up, she would do the same. She wanted to do more than make the huts tighter, the buildings sturdier, and the temple almost indestructible. She wanted to rebuild all of Spira with her own powers just as her father did not too long ago.

* * *

Religion of the World, Final Fantasy X/X-2, Yuna, loyalty

Yuna always believed in Yevon. If someone asked her how long she believed, she wouldn't be able to answer, except to say for as long as possible. She never spoke against anyone who questioned Yevon, but she never understood why people would even question, much less challenge the very religion that saved the lives of many on Spira.

She made it a point to pray at least once a day, and show respect to any Priest that walked by her. She earned respect too by aspiring to be a Summoner. For Yuna, it was all about Spira and what she could do for the governing religion. She never cared what others believed or didn't believe, she only cared to remain as loyal as possible to the religion of the world.

* * *

clear blue water, final fantasy X, yuna, bright blue waves

Yuna wished she were a poet, that way she could do more than just view the ocean as "bright blue waves". She couldn't do much better than beautiful or misty or loud as they crashed in the beach. She often danced before the waves whether she was Sending the Dead or not. She found that hard to describe too.

Yuna just smiled at the ocean, felt lightweight and free around it. She relaxed when the ocean kissed wind caressed her, and she still couldn't describe the bright blue waves, except to say that the ocean carried different shades and blue and green. She didn't want to say that they looked like jewels because that was too cliched. Yuna wasn't a poet, but she quickly realized that others could do that job for her. She had better things to do, like Summon and dance in front of the bright blue waves.

* * *

Scars, Final Fantasy X, Auron, old scars

Scars existed both inside and out. Auron had plenty of scars. While he had no shame in them, he still made it a point to keep himself as covered as possible. He inwardly smiled at the notion of being a mystery.

When no one was watching, he'd sometimes look at the scars all over his body. Some barely scratched an inch of his skin while others covered a large part of him. Every scar told a story, and nearly all of them had an ending. Some happy, some not. Some brought back great memories, while others brought only unshed tears.

Now, he helped Braska's daughter, and he knew that one day, all of his scars would fade away.


	15. Indescribable

Notes: Written for DW's "Porn Battle". Prompt: Final Fantasy X-2, Gippal/Baralai, together, love, sand, mouth, language, rough, slow. I wrote this in a sort of "stream of conciousness style".

* * *

The desert. Indescribable except for sand, unbelievable night sky sprinkled with stars that could reflect the sand if they were mirrors. The two don't know what to do. One is Al Bhed, blond, one-eyed and like a god. The other is of Yevon, dark skinned, white haired, and indescribable except for beautiful brown eyes. They are indescribable under the desert moon, sand, sky, cool air. They are away from the others in a nightly ritual of breathing, touching, climaxing under the desert sky. They know what to do. They always do yet don't yet do it all anyway. No one knows, and no one cares. No one asks, and no one tells. Like anyone would stop them in the middle of the Bikanel Desert full of sand, monsters, guns and love.

Gippal is an Al Bhed full of smiles, of energy, of everything the Yevonite Baralai did not resist. He has a sensual mouth with a sensual blue eye, a sensual eye-patch, and sensual skills. Baralai, ever the attempted poet, could never describe his dearest friend, just like he couldn't describe the desert full of sand that stretched for miles under the clear night sky. Beautiful desert, desolate in the day, desolate in the night yet full of what cannot be described by anyone, not even poets. Perhaps they could try and fail. Perhaps they could describe the two young men sitting next to each other in the desert, naked in the desert, a contrast in the desert. Try and fail. To interfere is to try and die.

Is there a point to all this? Baralai does not know, nor does he care. Gippal knows, but still doesn't care. All they need is love with no apologies, explanations, justifications, or anything except for more making love. The desert accepts them just as the luminous full moon accepts them the way the stars accept the cold universe. Baralai sighs, unable to describe anything, except for the warmth of his friend and lover next to him. They are silent now, except for their breaths against the desert air gliding over their bodies, cool against warm skin. Baralai leans into Gippal, wanting him more, but he is patient because he knows that there will be many more days like this.

Just like this.


End file.
